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How to redefine failure (and success)
If you look up failure in the dictionary, it’s defined as ‘the fact of someone or something not succeeding’. When you think about it, what does that even mean? How do we define success? Is it about what other people say about what happened? How we feel about it? Whether we made money from it?
What ‘weebles’ can teach us when we wobble.
If anyone tells you that they are so ‘sorted’ that they never wobble, don’t believe them. The point isn’t to never wobble, the point is to come back to a balanced place as quickly as possible.
Does comparison-itis get in your way?
The ability to see at any one time what hundreds or even thousands of our friends and colleagues are up to on social media is a mixed blessing. On the one hand, how amazing is it that we can all be connected in this way? Imagine navigating lockdown without being able...
The tyranny of the ‘should’
If there’s one word that should come with a big flashing neon light around it, it’s ‘should’. The German psychoanalyst Karen Horney perceptively talked about “the tyranny of the should.” What does it mean if we say that we should do something? It...
Imposter syndrome: how it holds you back, and how to beat it.
How to recognise and overcome the often crippling effects of imposter syndrome.
Some ways to cope with an uncertain future.
As it becomes more and more obvious that things are not ‘going back to normal’ any time soon, all of us find ourselves facing an uncertain future. Perhaps the first thing is to recognise that none of us ever have the kind of certainty or control over our lives that we...
How to stop taking things so personally.
The misery that many of us cause ourselves by worrying about what other people think and how they will react is largely avoidable. We need to stop taking things so personally.
Toxic positivity, toxic negativity, and how to avoid them.
It’s toxic when we tell ourselves that we should always ‘be positive’ because the feelings don’t go away because we’re denying them. Instead they build up underneath, ready to come squirting out at a later date or time.
Why you don’t need ‘self-improvement’.
I hate the term self-improvement. Even the term personal development is slightly dodgy, though I use it for want of anything better. Why do I resist these terms? Because you don’t ever need to improve yourself. You are just fine. Any problems you are encountering are...
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